Writing in the Dark
you asked, I listened
Every day for the last week, between one and five of you have emailed me. These emails all ask me to remove the paywall on my latest post, debunking some of the claims about Social Security going around the internet, so you can share it with your family and friends.
That kind of enthusiasm is both flattering and deeply appreciated—thank you for your support.
I've heard you. The paywall is down. Here's the link:
I know I’ve been posting infrequently, and I’m sorry for that.
I wish I had an exciting reason—some thrilling project in the works, a big reveal on the horizon. I wish I could say anything positive, hopeful, or interesting was behind my dearth of posts.
But the truth is as ugly and simple as it is difficult: I’m in the worst depression I’ve had in years, trapped in a hole so deep and dark that part of me wonders if the world I think I remember before this was ever real at all.
Occasionally, a spark of energy breaks through, and I pour it into writing. Those moments are rare but precious. When they pass, at least I have something real—something that reminds me a version of myself I still want to believe in is still here, somewhere.
But those moments don’t come as often as they used to.
When they do, I’ll keep writing.
Right now, life is brutally difficult, mostly because I’m nowhere near the best version of myself. Definitely not within shouting distance. Maybe not even within driving distance.
I don’t believe anyone’s listening to prayers, but I could be wrong, so if you do—please, say one for me.
Before the best part of me shut down, hopefully not forever, I wrote some things I’m proud of. Here are a few links in case you missed them.
I’ll be back when I have something worth saying.
Links
Wherein I returned to discussing politics, but only behind the paywall:
LEGO and Politics...
The first part of this essay (before the paywall) quotes from two of my previous posts about LEGO. Just an FYI that if some of this feels familiar, it’s because you are a longtime and careful reader, and you’re not imagining it.
Another political topic — my take on DEI changes in the culture of late:
The Space Shuttle Discovery
In my latest post, I returned to discussing politics—strictly behind the paywall. If you're interested, you’ll find the link below.
Why you should enjoy, or at least appreciate, the American Sign Language interpreters:
What the variability of traits has to do with women, men, and career choices:
Wherein I take on “the math wars” and demolish a DEI math book:
Decapitating Meritocracy's Corpse
This post has a lot of pictures and thus is too long for most email clients, especially gmail. Click on the title above to read it on the Substack website.
I know that depression can be far more than just debilitating. I have a family member who suffers bouts and it’s difficult to go through…and to watch. We here with you and aren’t going anywhere. Whoever was gonna leave has left by now. Most of us want to share whatever friendship we have with you or whatever you need. And as a Christian, you’ve been in my mind and in my prayers. I would certainly never force anything I believe in you or anyone just as I wouldn’t like it. I believe I speak for most of your subs when I say that your voice is heard and valuable and we’re still listening. Reach out to any one of us and you’ll hear the same thing. We’re just glad that you’ve got really good friends such as Josh Slokum. And when it comes time to drive back to a better place, we’ll be along for the ride. Looking forward to reading your thoughts again soon.
Thinking of you, and sending up a prayer for you. I've been in that black pit myself on quite a few occasions; I hope you are able to climb out soon.
This can be a tough time of year for those of us in New England - the cold and ice and gray skies and feeling of isolation do nothing to improve our state of mind. Hoping that as the days lengthen and the earth reawakens you will start feeling better.